初一的英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯

　　1、

　　Hurrying my 11-year old daughter to school, I made a right turn at a red light when it was prohibited. Uh-oh, I said, realizing my mistake. I just make an illegal turn.I guess it's all right, my daughter replied, The police car behind us did the same thing.

　　我趕著開(kāi)車(chē)將11歲的女兒送到學(xué)校去，在紅燈處右拐了，而那是不允許的(譯注:在一些國(guó)家如英國(guó),其交通規(guī)則是車(chē)輛左行的,與我國(guó)相反)。啊噢，意識(shí)到犯了錯(cuò)誤，我說(shuō)。我剛才拐彎是違章的。我想那沒(méi)關(guān)系的，女兒回答說(shuō)：我們后面的警車(chē)也同樣拐了彎。

　　2.

　　A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.

　　The driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much. "The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years."

　　乘客輕拍了一下出租車(chē)司機(jī)的肩膀,想問(wèn)個(gè)問(wèn)題. 司機(jī)大叫起來(lái), 車(chē)也失去了控制, 幾乎撞上一輛公車(chē), 還上了便道, 在還差幾厘米就撞上商店櫥窗時(shí)終于停了下來(lái).

　　司機(jī)說(shuō),“伙計(jì),別再這么干了. 你把我嚇破膽了!”乘客抱歉地說(shuō), “我沒(méi)想到拍你一下就嚇成這樣.” 司機(jī)說(shuō),“對(duì)不起,也不全是你的錯(cuò). 今天是我第一天開(kāi)出租. 以前25年里我一直開(kāi)殯葬車(chē).”

　　3.

　　When his wife was expecting their third child, a father decided to tell his two sons, ages seven and nine, the facts of life. He checked out several books from the library on how parents should approach the subject. After stumbling through an explanation, he took a deep breath, and said, "Now, boys, do you have any questions?"

　　"Yes," the younger boy answered immediately.

　　"Go ahead," said the man, his heart in his throat.

　　"Can we," his son asked, "have new baseball gloves?"

　　當(dāng)妻子要生第三胎時(shí)，父親決定給分別已七歲和九歲的兩個(gè)兒子講關(guān)于性的知識(shí)。他從圖書(shū)館查出幾本書(shū)，都是關(guān)于父母如何涉及這個(gè)話題的。在結(jié)結(jié)巴巴地解釋一番后，他長(zhǎng)出了一口氣，然后說(shuō)：“好了，孩子們，有什么問(wèn)題嗎?”

　　“有，”小兒子立即回答。 “問(wèn)吧，”爸爸說(shuō)，心提到了嗓子眼兒。

　　“我們，”兒子問(wèn)道，“可以得到新棒球手套了嗎?”

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